Vigilance

I don't think this is a war…
I don't wish to conquer him…
I really just want to guide him to adulthood…
with no permanent damage to his body or reputation.

I am thankful that I was able to find him last night.
There was a stakeout…following tips…missed opportunities…and finally an ultimatum of hurting his friend's reputation with a future employer. I feel badly about threatening someone, but I was serious. I needed them to understand how serious I really am.

I was making dinner tonight…sautéing mushrooms…and then I wanted to deglaze the pan so I grabbed a bottle of wine…after I poured I read the label…Vigilance. It was called vigilance…I think it's an interesting sign…as long as it doesn't turn into hyper-vigilance.

So, now I have to figure out how to get him some help…and have him cooperate.
Even his friends think he is out of control at this point.
It's time to get some advice and help.

My time with S#3 yesterday was nice. It has been a very long time since the two of us sat down and just talked. It was comfortable…but not totally. I felt like we were testing the waters…We did talk about our kids. She seems to feel as if she might be child-free by summer. She has had these expectations before. I wonder how she will transition to a house to herself. I am sure it will take a little getting used to.

This morning I was sitting in Meeting…and my song, As A Mother, came to mind. The message is that parenting is a reflection of divine love. A mother's love is unconditional…and instinctual. We also sang Here I Am Lord at the beginning, before worship. There is a line, "I have wept for love of them, they turn away." Well that made me realize I am not the only person who has ever experienced this…nor will I be the last…I quietly cried with that feeling of being held by a community which have survived many difficulties in their lives…it was good.

I hope that you are having a good weekend with your family. I appreciate your support through this time. It is so good to know there are people who care. I appreciate you very much.

Love and Light,
Maggie