Quoth

Oh Maggie,

It got me. The bug that's been flitting around - it got me. My muscles ache, my throat burns. I am exhausted...  Oh well...

Today is my friend's funeral.  We have been debating who will go. The problem is that my granddaughter's sperm donor will possibly be there.  And we have to be so careful, not to set him off.  And so we avoid places he will be.  So I will stay home with the baby.  My daughter will go with her towering cousin!

Addiction causes so many problems - so many of them unexpected because the logic of someone overusing pharmaceutical pain killers comes from nowhere.

And so we have to be alert, maybe hypervigilant, all the time.

I found a beautiful quote.  If I can make sense of it, it may become my resolution for 2015.


Love yourself for the blessing to this world that you are...
Love others as much as you, yourself, want to be loved...
And magnificent bridges will begin to appear in the most unexpected places

      -Oren Lyon, Faith Keeper of the Turtle Clan of the Seneca Nation

This has everything to do with getting into the heart chakra and making that be the center of ourself.  But as always, I struggle with the "love myself" - which is the first part, the first step. If I can't get that, none of the other matters.

I am wondering if, by loving others the way I want to be loved, if it will soften me and allow me to love myself...or is that the codependent inside of me using twisted logic to bypass the hard part???

And as a final thought, I found the last words of one of our ancestresses, as written on her gravestone...

It is my will and charge to all my Children that they walk in ye Fear of ye Lord, and in Love and Peace towards each other.

The fear of the Lord stuff I can overlook to get to the Love and Peace part.  Grandma says we hafta,so wehafta.


I love you, my sister!

Clare