you are slipping more deeply into the sadness and depression...
it's probably a combination of all of the components that you wrote about.
Perhaps it is time to speak with your daughter about your needs.
She is wrapped up in her own issues and needs...
but that doesn't mean that you need to be the total martyr.
You recoil from the concept of suffering but allow your self to be sacrificed to everyone else's current wants and needs.
What do you need?
Perhaps you could reach out to your supportive friends and talk through some of this.
Perhaps you could find a therapist...
you know how dangerous depression is in our family...
Don't minimize your feelings...
you are reaching out to me...
you are welcomed to come here and regain your balance anytime...
I have space enough...and it's quiet through the day...Just a thought.
you are actually using feeling words...
so the numbing is lifting...
perhaps that is a hopeful sign.
Holding you in the Light,
Maggie
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