Congratulations on passing the licensing exam. I never had a doubt that you would pass a test! So let's just see what happens next - which doors begin to swing open.
I'm glad I made the trust list. I feel much the same - like no one knows all of me, that I keep parts of myself secret, mostly for fear of rejection. I am accepting more of myself, though, which makes it easier to trust. I think...
I think being pregnant was the time when I was most physical, most integrated. Maybe that's why I liked being pregnant. And breastfeeding...During sex, only sometimes. But i was probably sexual activity that forced us out of ourselves, making it hard to be integrated for ever after...that's sad. Making it hard to be integrated until we face it and feel...Better, maybe.
I publicly say rape...I have publicly said it, but I say it from a distance. I don't feel it, don;t identify with the victim, with the self. I noticed the same reaction when I watched the video about Wabi-Sabi. I listened to her story, and cried...but I didn't quite associate it with the woman on the screen. It was like a fairy tale - a bad one. I never quite considered this before...I will have to think.
Deaths don't always come in threes, but they do often enough that I also wait for the third. I'll wait with you...
It's late...Love from Clare
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