Sunday, March 17, 2013

pessimistic thoughts...

I was just telling a friend about S#3's birthday, which culminated in her going home and being admitted to the hospital.  Well, maybe it wasn't quite that concise, but I'm pretty guiltily sure that she picked up the cold that set off the asthma crisis from us.  The friend asked some questions about asthma in the family, and I don't know why but for the first time I realized that our two sibs who tried to commit suicide are the two with asthma.  (Someone has to state the obvious, and usually it's me, which doesn't make me look real bright, but the words get said...)  Do you think there's a connection?

I was also thinking about your research linking abuse to allergies, and in our family allergies and asthma are certainly connected.

Do you think these two sibs are more sensitive to abuse than the rest of us?  Or maybe less resilient?  Or does more sensitive mean less resilient?

I was also wondering if that sensation of not being able to catch their breath, which has to feel like an impending sense of doom, has anything to do with their attempts...Like death has been lurking for years and years.

I guess I have been thinking about all those strikes against us that you listed a few days ago.  And I have been observing the next generation and seeing that they are more fragile - is that a good word? - than we were.  And that we have more health problems than mom and dad.  I know it's partly from what our civilization has done to the environment.  Our foods are poisoned and processed.  Our air and water are dirty.  It seems to be impossible to be healthy.  But the abuse continues each generation, and there seems to be less resiliency.

I saw a quote that said the current generation may be the first ever to have a shorter life span than their parents.  It's affecting us all.  Guess I'm having a pessimistic day...

Hope your weekend is full of joy!

Clare

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