Men need to care when they are making women suffer

https://medium.com/@emmalindsay/what-i-learned-from-dating-women-who-have-been-raped-583e1001b6cd#.69wwmckej

Hi Maggie,

I read this article today. I feel like I need to read it again and again.

In the beginning, as I read,  I was becoming increasingly anxious. I'm not broken.  In fact I am strong and smart and loving...but something inside me is broken...

I read fast, absorbing, accepting, rejecting...

Then I got to the words:  Men need to care when they are making women suffer. 

Wow! Gobsmacked!

So simple, but I never thought of it...never recognized it.

Then her statement that we have all been sexually traumatized. It's only a matter of degree. And it's true. I suddenly remembered all of the pushy guys in my life, who only wanted access to my body.

It's true for all of us.

I don't know if I ever chose a love or lover. I was chosen, pursued.  Did I ever want it? Him? Once I was there in a safe place, yes - I know I did.  But my part was mostly resistance in the beginning.

Is it ever mutual and lovely and connected??? I wonder.

I had a very long day, and am overwhelmed.

I will be back tomorrow night.

I love you!!!

Clare