isolation

Clare,

It is hot...
So far this morning I have talked with my wise friend...
and walked 4 miles...
contemplating the words of my wise friend.

We talked alot about isolation...
as a set up for abuse...
as a protective mechanism after abuse...
as a box that is keeping me from moving forward...
I can analyze all of this as much as I am able to...
but in isolation it means much less than if it is shared.

That's why this dialogue/blog is so important...
we are sharing...connecting...listening respectfully to each other.
we have created a community (of 2).
You may have been on and off in my life...
but you are the closest thing I have to real consistency in our family of origin...
S#3 also, although she is not a part of this dialogue.
I told my wise friend about my dreams...
she felt that the open, flail chest was a sign that I am opening...the wall around my heart is breaking away.

So what feelings did you have as you explored Fburg?
Do you want to come visit and we can explore it together...on foot?
I still haven't had the inner motivation to go back...but it might bring insight.

So the physician in me is identifying underlying organs for your dumb and fat...
lower left ribs...spleen and kidney...cleansing and protecting organs
right shoulder...pain referred to the right shoulder is liver or gallbladder...again liver is cleansing and protecting...gall bladder is helpful for digestion.
Maybe they were protecting you and your heart...not blocking, but purifying and detoxifying the materials that eventually made their way to your heart...maybe?

I feel at peace this morning...sorry afternoon.
Thanks,
Maggie