agreements

I didn't ask her to soul search...I told her that I was searching for answers and healing...
and asked her to tell me her stories...to fill in the blanks.
I actually thought of Brene Brown after I read her email and considered sending her the link...
but that would be overwhelming.

You are right...we were raised/domesticated to be quiet and meek...
What the hell went wrong??
Why do those girls have to be so damned opinionated and insightful??
All for the love of the Delana clan...
Sorry for the sarcasm, but I think we were put into this family to shine some Light into the secrets.

We are following through on our agreements. I believe that we make certain agreements in the soul realm, prior to our incarnation...to teach and learn specific lessons.
I often wonder why I chose to put myself into a family that was so dysfunctional and cruel...
What was I thinking?
Did I really believe that I could make a difference?
Am I making a difference?
Am I faithfully fulfilling those agreements?
I believe that if I follow my heart's voice...trust my intuition...then I am.

So I was supposed to do a drawing of fear...
I still can't make myself do it.
I have meditated on it...put it into words...words have always been easier for me...
but I keep avoiding drawing it...
I must know, deep down that something important is going to be visualized...
So today, after I finish this, I will arrange the colored pencils and paper and make an attempt.

I do agree with you about the allergies and asthma being a symptom of the dysfunction. My kids inherited them, through me. In spite of their having a relatively stress free lives (compared with ours). My oldest's asthma was frequently triggered by strong emotions...even laughing too hard. I never knew about the permission to do a tracheotomy...that's just bizarre, but probably was the standard for medicine in the 60's...before the inhaled meds were available.

I have to run...
I love you,
Maggie