short lived ceasefire

Clare,

So, the peace is being tested. My young man is picking a fight. He tries to engage in conflict to gain attention. He started right after the family session…
"when can I get my phone back?"...
"when we have a trusting"...
"that's unreasonable, how can I gain trust if you don't give it to me?"...
"it's gained in the small, everyday things".

Yesterday he forgot to clean up after his messes…
forgot to wake up for school…
went to dinner with us and then asked
"when can I go to football games?"...
"you already go to football games"…
"at my high school"…
"not in the near future because your foster brother plays at the same time".

Then he started asking about dating…
which evolved into not having freedom.
"how old is the girl?"...
"15"…
"maybe you should start with someone your age"…
"why, lots of people date younger people?…
"because it is safer- parents don't get a fearful if they are with someone their own age"…
and on it went.

He didn't go to bed- I asked
he went upstairs and cursed loudly a few times…
threw a few things…
and then had a social media rant about me.
He's threatening to escalate or leave.
I've talked with the CYS worker and Group home director…
both said let him decide what he's going to do.
Engaging will make it worse.
I have not brought up the social media posts…
he is walking on eggshells…
I'm imagining him anticipating a blow up from me.
That's what he's after.
I have to remain cool and detached.

Life is a roller coaster.
Be the change you wish to see.

Love and Light beautiful sister,
Maggie