Too much responsibility

Clare,

I'm writing for myself…
I think.
You may not see this for 3 weeks or more.

Vacation was a good experience…
some fighting…
a lot of loving…
too much sun, wine, and food…
all in all a success.

I went to work for a meeting today and found out that a friend's husband died unexpectedly this past weekend. He laid down for a nap and never got up. The interesting thing is that she was about 15 years older than him and we'd discussed how frightened he was to lose her. She is not in the best of health, and they both anticipated her dying in the not too distant future. She was not at work (obviously)…
there is a memorial service this weekend…

She is a truly remarkable human being.
She has made such a difference in my life.
I did not know him well…
but liked him, through her.

Life is strange.
You never know when your last day in this body will be.

I don't think that I really fear death.
There are times when I would welcome it…
not because I am suicidal…
but because I want to move to the next realm.
I know that I have work to do here…
but want very much to know Truths.

I spent the evening with my horse. He didn't shun me as I expected he would. I have not spent significant time with him in a year. I have been afraid of being hurt by his strength…but he was as gentle as ever. I love that creature/being.

My dog had a seizure last night…
again.
She gets so stressed by my absences that once I'm home she generally has a seizure. I love her and hate causing her stress, but she has difficulty even when I leave for work. I wish I could tell her it will be only for a short while.

I love my animals…
I love people…
I sometimes need a break though.

I spoke with B#4 today…
he is struggling…
B#2 is cycling up and down in moods and making life unbearable. B#4 has decided to ask him to move out. B#4 is confident that the other has the means to live independently. The decision is still difficult for him though. We talked for a while this morning, it was good to hear his struggles and they way that he works through them. I will hold them both in the Light.

All for now beautiful sister…
safe travels,
Maggie