Table Rock

Hi Maggie,

I'm excited for you to travel back to the desert, too.  I'm hoping everyone is on the way to being healed.  I'm surprised that your son chose a family home.  It was not what I was expecting.  But after staying there before he left for the program, he has a good idea what to expect.  Our baby sister and her husband are good with kids...I hope for the best for all of us.  I truly believe that as one of us heals, we all heal.

So, I know my kids like to be outdoors, a lot. Every chance they get, they retreat to nature.  They are very experienced campers.  Knowing this, I decided to take two pairs of shoes.  I took my sandals, and I took a pair of sneakers. I thought.  Actually I took two sneakers, two black sneakers, even - but they were from different pairs.  So I wore sandals the whole time I was there.

(They shared a family joke/story.  Once my son went to the grocery store with a list.  He came home with everything except the carrots.  He went back out for carrots, and came back with an assortment of goodies, but no carrots.  The third time, he came back with only carrots.  They were laughing, and I was able to stand up for him by reminding them that he is the son of a woman who traveled across the country with mismatched shoes.)

We went to a lake, but those trails were easy to walk on.  The sandals were fine.  I went on a tree sniffing walk with my daughter-in-law.  The Jeffrey pine smells like butterscotch - it really does.

The next day we had some options. I/we chose to climb the Table Rocks, because once on top, we would be on the same level as the turkey vultures.  I learned that the Klamath people call them Peace Eagles.  I have decided that they are right, and am changing their name in my mind.

The trail for Table Rocks is two miles uphill, essing back and forth across steep terrain. I warned them that we would have to go slow.  And I was right.  I am not used to temperatures in the high 90s, nor to climbing steep hillsides. In sandals.

But we made it.

Because it was August, the top was golden dry.  But it was open and expansive and there were peace eagles, some very close, some dancing on the warm updrafts.  My daughter-in-law told me that there are some flowers that can be found only there, and a species of fairy shrimp, also found only there and only in the springtime. The flowers only blossom in the wet period, and they blossom in rings. It sounded like magic and I would love to see it. But even without the flowers, it was still magic.

We had a picnic, and hiked around the top. My son told me that the earth we were standing on was the original, ancient soil.  It was a table because rivers eroded the rest of the earth down, way down.  Standing on primordial earth appealed to me.  I expected to feel the peace eagles and the ancient ones.  Instead I "saw" lines of people dancing. They reminded me that we know who we are, and what we should be doing.  They reminded me of balance, of being in balance.That old knowledge is still in us.

I feel like I brought some of them home with me.

There was one outcropping, just beyond some trees. I went and stood there, and knew I was on an island.  I don't know exactly what it means, but it was a message. Then we started to walk back to the trail to start down.  My granddaughter found a peace eagle feather, and asked her dad to carry her on his shoulders. She extended her arms, held the feather and "soared" across the table top.

Walking down was almost harder than walking up.  I got real hot, but didn't sweat. I was beginning to feel a bit afraid.  But I made it.  I dumped cool water on my neck and face, then head and got into the air conditioned car.

I loved being up there with them. I had such a strong sense of family connection, the whole time I was there, really...

I hope you sleep well.  How have you been feeling?

Love and hugs, 

Clare