memories

I somehow always had that memory in my mind...didn't know what to do with it, but it was always there. You ask about my earliest memory...I am not sure...I remember falling into water in Lebanon with brother #2 and he held my coat hood until a larger person pulled me out and carried me home. Indian town Gap memories are where the abuse began...Fredericksburg is where the majority of the abuse occurred...Palmyra it stopped.

There aren't really any solid, good memories until I went to school.

Last night I was reading, The Places That Scare You, by Pema Chodron...
it is amazing the books I've collected over the years that fall off the shelf at the perfect time...
There was a quote,
"The "secret" of life that we are all looking for is just this: to develop through sitting and daily life practice the power and courage to return to that which we have spent a lifetime hiding from, to rest in the bodily experience of the present moment- even if it is a feeling of being humiliated, of failing, of abandonment, of unfairness."  Charlotte Joko Beck
I feel like that is what we are doing by writing all of this. Sitting with the messiness and chaos, in the present moment and learning from that discomfort.

When I was thinking about the Grimm's tales, I thought of Hansel and Gretel. Their family was facing starvation so the mother sent them into the world to protect herself and their father. The children of course are an easy mark for the wicked witch, who captures them and plans to cook them for dinner. Gretel is asked, by the witch, to see if the oven is hot. Knowing what would happen if she got close to the fire, she was smart enough to ask the witch to demonstrate. When the witch got close enough, put her head into the oven, Gretel pushed her in and slammed the door. Terrible story, but two things jump out at me;
First, Gretel found courage and the intelligence to save herself.
Second, maybe the witch has to be figured out before she can be destroyed. Maybe, as in your dream, you have to understand the contents of the box before you can destroy it.
Just a thought.

Love and Blessings.
Maggie