Thursday, August 2, 2012

imperfections are opportunities for authenticity

I am sorry that I am delayed today. I wanted to get a walk in before it got too hot and then I was distracted by my kids. I visited daughter #2"s new apartment, she's moving in 2 weeks. We shopped for some of the things that she will need. It is very nice, much nicer than I ever had in college. Her roommate is a recently separated woman that manages the ice cream store where she works. She is very organized and has alot of energy.

I appreciate your post about sexual abuse. I have wondered why, despite minding my own business in public, men feel as if they can make suggestive comments, tell me I dress provocatively, or expose themselves to me. It has made me question my own self values and worth. It is abuse directed towards all women.

I recently read this;
"I can't get to my real feelings about sex, my body, my physical health or my mental and emotional health because there are too many messages and expectations blocking the way. I am so worried about what, who, and how I'm supposed to be that I can't figure out who I am and who I want to be....eventually I give up on being authentic and just hope to be perceived as normal." from I Thought It Was Just me (but it isn't), by Brene Brown. I think that my struggle with my authenticity is experienced by numerous women...all domesticated to believe that they are worthy only because of their beauty, figure, fertility or just because they are available. We are not appreciated for our intelligence, warmth, intuition, insight or for just being ourselves.

I agree with you that this story will develop as other's add their recollections. It will add a depth and breadth to all of this. Any input will be appreciated to more fully understand. And it is optional, so no one will be pressured into contributing.
I expect some fall out though...I hope that I am wrong about that.
So, will you handle informing S#3 of this blog? I can if you would like me to, but you talk to her more frequently than I do.

This morning, as I was meditating, I picked up a book that was laying nearby...
the author wrote about Navajo blankets and how they intentionally leave an imperfection in the corner of each one...they believe that through the imperfection the Spirit enters.
So, I will assume that the spirit is entering through all of my flaws and imperfections and try to begin to view them as opportunities.

So, now you are busy with your preparations...transitions are exhausting and invigorating. As you clean and prepare are you finding any insights or surprises?
I am traveling next week as well. While daughter #1 was in Italy I decided that I would like to fulfill a lifelong dream and visit Paris. I have wanted to go for 38 years, ever since I began studying french in middle school. I considered the amount of school work and soul work that this past 2 years have been and booked a flight and a hotel. So, next week, husband and I are exploring Paris for a long weekend. I want to know why this city and country have held my attention for so long. I am wondering, will I feel at home or like an outsider. I have told husband that we have no agenda, except to explore where we feel drawn. It should be a very interesting weekend. Who knows, maybe next summer I will go for a more extended time to Provence and experience that.

I am glad that you have the Wolves book to read on your journey...
Blessings,
maggie

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