I agree that to know something you must know it's opposite, or understand it's absence. Grammies have to die, plans have to fall through, sometimes the object of your affection does not return the feeling. We have to suffer sometimes. But there has to be a balance, and I don't think it is a 50-50 balance. The balance should be in favor of joy.
Do you remember how often we were told to "offer it up" when we complained about something? It's the whole religious focus on the sanctity of suffering and martyrdom. I have attended churches where the message was: this place is to be endured, until we get to heaven and finally find joy.
I feel in my bones...I feel in my soul...this is wrong.
We are not supposed to be abused and left to suffer in shame and isolation for the rest of our lives. And that is what happens to many, if not most of us. This is not the life a Christ would want for humanity. It just isn't. But we use that story of suffering to encourage people to endure, to live a life of suffering or of numbedness.
And people like us, we don't simply cycle through life. We are in pain, expecting pain, isolating ourselves against pain all the time. The balance is heavily skewed toward suffering with a few moments of joy to give us the hope and courage to try another day.
Happy New Year, little sister. May all your dreams come true this year - and may you laugh.
Love from Clare
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