triggering

Clare,
The trip was a whirlwind 4 day trip to the southwest for orientation. The university did not provide one right before move in , so we had to make a special trip out for that. It was a great opportunity to see the campus, have some great southwest food, and visit the Grand Canyon.

It was truly a 'bucket list day'...

when I typed that last sentence it came out 'buck day"...very weird

The trip was a guided tour, but offered free time to roam. I posted pictures on social media of my youngest's thrill seeking...
it made me sick to watch him...
so I walked away and asked the 'Angels of Protection' to be with him.

I realized on that day that he is very much like Papa...
which is one of the reasons I react so strongly to his 'shenanigans'
(except for the fact that he LOVES heights).
When my son gets frustrated, even mildly, he makes rude, loud comments.
He won't talk to the person who is able to answer or make things right...
he chooses to call out their 'sins'...
embarrass or shame them...
and win others to his 'side'.
He doesn't see that there is no need for sides...
just better communication and a willingness to adapt- from all sides.
I realized that I am incredibly uncomfortable when he starts to rant because I felt shame when Papa did that. It's not that I want him to accept abuse or poor treatment...
but he has to understand that sometimes things don't work out as perfectly as they are planned.
The ironic thing is that he is never on time for anything and frequently fails to uphold his end of any agreement.
But he is triggering Papa reactions in me.
Once I recognize it I can start to monitor and adapt the way that I respond to him.

I hope that you are well.

Love and Light beautiful sister,
Maggie