Clare,
The lentils are interesting. I make a batch with 1 cup lentils to 4 cups vegetable broth and then add 3 cups brown rice- so I eat the same thing for days in a row. It's easier for me and I don't really mind repeating the same meal. This weekend's I added carrots, onions, sundered tomatoes, roasted red peppers and basil. It is really good and I had it all in the pantry or in the garden. I had the strength to weed my vegetable garden yesterday and found 4 zucchini- 2 were huge. I think I'm going to grate them and freezes them for later use. I also harvested a nice amount of tomatoes that I will throw into a salad tomorrow.
My youngest does not want to write…
even to put away for later.
Believe me I've offered several times.
He is very intensely looking at going away to a boarding school this fall. even though we've missed most of the deadlines he really wants a new start or change. He just feels listless here. I am proud of him for identifying an active way to make change. But, it will be very strange to have him away during the week. There are 2 that we are inquiring into- each boards Sunday - Thursday and they come home for weekends. We will see where that goes.
I went back to Meeting today, for the first time since surgery. It was so nice to be with that community again. I just feel so embraced when I go there. I had a wonderful talk with a Friend/friend about my son and the whole experience. It was nice to talk about it a week later- when some of the pieces that happened so quickly can come together.
I am amazed that I am not self-conscious about the change in my body, post-surgery. One of the things I worried about before surgery was being deformed. But, now that I am healing I don't care. It's funny, today I was thinking about how I feel like a pubertal girl- every week they get a little bigger. I worried about my shirts being baggy and not feeling feminine- but the reality is that breasts didn't make me feminine…I am a woman with or without them. I love the fact that I never have to wear a bra and they don't move. It's a whole different feeling.
Tomorrow I begin Tamoxifen, an anti-estrogen drug. It will put me into menopause so that's the next hurdle. Our cousin has told me that the first month is the worst for hot flashes and emotional lability. So, I have warned those around me to excuse any outbursts. I have to take it for 5 years to prevent any further tumors from starting. They cannot guarantee that they removed every bit of breast tissue so this is the price to be paid. Oh well, it's better than another cancer. I have to keep waking faithfully because there is a risk of clots in the veins on that medication.
Today I allowed myself chocolate for the first time in about 3 months. I've decided that I am going to go back to the near raw diet that I was on, beginning in March, tomorrow. So, today I splurged. I had a mocha latte lite and chocolate covered acai berries. Not an extreme day- but its the first real splurge I've had in months. But, tomorrow I go back to no sugar, processed wheat, dairy (except I use kefir in my protein shake), caffeine, etc. I feel good on this diet. I also have to remember that that pesky mutation is still in my cells and any toxins are potential tumors- so this has to be a long-term commitment.
That's about all for today.
Love and Light,
Maggie
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