That funeral sounds really wonderful. I am sure that the rawness of watching dirt being placed on a loved ones body would cause a visceral reaction. But that reaction is acknowledging the loss.
I had another session with the energy healer today. She asked me a very interesting question that I did not know how to answer...so I am asking you. While she was working between my second and third chakras she described that the energy changed from the usual heavy, wet mud consistency to an oily, slippery material and then thought of the word "teflon"...the only thing that I could think of was that I am plastic to the outside world and pretend to not let negative things stick to me, despite them hurting me deeply. That answer feels somewhat right, but not on target. Do you have any insights?
I talked a lot about Mom today...my thinking she was a saint for most of my young life, not realizing or admitting her duality until I was an adult. She is a complicated figure in my life, I'm still trying to sort out my thoughts on her.
I talked about Pop today...had a strong sensation that there were memories buried that occurred after he used to stroke my palm and call me his "little chickadee". Nothing that I could piece together, but a feeling.
I also had a flashback to a dream about one of our brothers molesting one of my sons, and his response, when caught, was ,"What? That's what Dad used to do". I actually caught myself in the middle of the recollection and was embarrassed that she might have been able to "see" it too. She never said anything about it. I may email her and ask her if that was something she identified and possibly took away...I hope so.
I was asked if I want to join a counseling group today. I said that I would be interested in exploring it. The doctor told me to contact their human resources person after my license is finalized. Maybe I am destined for one on one healing type work. Maybe your friend was right, I would direct them from my intuition/gut. I have a few weeks before the license is finalized and then I will be even healthier and more whole to take on such a responsibility.
Have a great night.
Love and Light,
Maggie
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