breathing easier

Clare,

I also feel very bad about killing anything. It stays with me a long time when I do. When my youngest was about a year and half he picked up on this idea. He carried lady bugs, that had entered the house, out onto the porch and released them. He didn't realize that they were freezing to death out there. After a while he had a large collection of dead ladybugs that he considered pets (of course he though they were hanging around waiting for him).

I think that we all avoid each other for a variety of reasons, one of which is probably not wanting to rock our memories. Most of us have them neatly packed away in a remote crevice of our brain...safely out of reach. But when we get together things might be recalled...or worse we might actually talk about something significant. It is interesting that, while others were able to block the negative stuff and glorify our family life, you took on the negative aspects and magnified those in your mind. I wonder if that is the "first born" ultra-responsible traits or just your personality.

I took the dog for an MRI today. She is much improved on half the dose of phenobarb. She had bloody diarrhea on the table when she was anesthetized. Luckily it was an older, experienced vet monitoring her who said that is fairly common in stressed dogs...otherwise my vet would be working that up too. I can't believe the two weeks that this dog has had. Hopefully all of this is behind us and she will get back to normal. The scouting report was that the MRI was OK. The official report will be called tomorrow.

So, it is October...and still no real job. It's kind of funny though because I am not nearly as stressed about this as I was before.

Did I tell you that I am taking an online writing course of scientific writing? It's through Stanford. This week it is all about using active voice and dynamic verbs. I am getting the hang of it after the lecture.

I am so tired tonight. My cough is much better, but am still bringing up mucus. But the wheezing is almost gone. I was able to walk for a mile and a half today...first time in days...it felt good. Breathing easier again.
Love and Light,
Maggie