Happy Easter

Clare,
Happy Easter.
It is evening…
everything is quiet…
for now.
The girls have returned to school.
The boys are in their respective places.

We had another incident last evening…
the oldest, who was still grounded for last week's activities, went AWOL.
He was out taking pictures when I returned from a walk about 6…
I texted him at 7 for dinner and her replied that he had left…
got a ride…
wouldn't be back until Sunday night…
and don't worry.
Well, I did worry…
but I didn't track him down the way that I usually do.
I decided (we decided) to let him come back on his own…
I told him that dinner was set for 3 pm and we'd like him back by then.
He complied…
came home about 12…
ate and retreated to his room…
he is minimally interactive but not angry…
I think he's just avoiding the inevitable conversation.
I told him that I was glad he came home, but am disappointed in his decision.
I am not sure where this is going…
but I am following my inner leading on this one…
I trust it will be correct.

I have a 90 year old friend, she rides to Meeting with me each week…
I just love having her there…
she is like the mother that I can tell the bad stuff too.
She's been through so many difficulties and joys in her life…
and she reassures me that the good, early life he had will come back to influence him…
just be patient and consistent.
She is good to me…
I trust that it will be so…
it is just so difficult to surrender to that trust.

I picked up a book tonight, A Lamp in the Darkness: Illuminating the Path Through Difficult Times, by Jack Kornfield. I just started it but feel it is the right thing for me at this time. He refers to "the one who knows you inside" as the guiding, still, small voice…asks you to trust it and to open the vastness of it…and possibility of blessings within the difficulties. I think I need this one.

I am going to try to have that conversation with the older son…
I'll be back tomorrow.
Love and Light,
Maggie