Thursday, August 15, 2013

two thoughts...

Tears are what happen when the brain shifts from a state of stress to a state of recovery. They indicate that a child has moved out of problem-solving mode (acknowledgement of a problem and desire to do something about it) and into futility mode (acceptance of the problem and the realization that he can't solve, fix or change it). It’s an emotional release that occurs as the nervous system undergoes a shift from sympathetic (stress/ fight-or-flight responses) to parasympathetic (maintenance of the body at rest). Tears are a body’s route to recovery; the return to a state of rest.    -Kelly Bartlett

Two things made me think today.  First is the quote above.  I was especially thinking about you not crying, and thinking about the amount of stress you maintain.  One more facet of vigilance!

Then, I had another thought yesterday, that I chewed on a lot last night.

Who am I?  If we remove all the broken, bloodied, wounded bits, who am I?  I am not sure, completely, but I know I am the quiet, loving, accepting eyes of mamahood.

As I considered this, I wondered who my oldest is.  If we take away my harshness and my yelling and her alcoholic father's influence - who is she?  Because although she is amazing, she struggles with depression and her own numbing techniques...she struggles with awareness which makes it all harder to live with...

Hope you're having fun!!

Clare

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