Today was good and bad...
I am ambivalent, again.
I had a really good time meeting with the staff and other candidates for the openings....that's good.
I over-think everything...that's bad.
I spent days researching and planning this awareness-raising activity, tried it out on my kids and they "got it"...tried it on husband who didn't get the activity but understood the message...
Today, I had 5 small groups and one just didn't get it...
they weren't hearing my directions and I although I re-explained the guidelines and showed them what was expected they still did not complete the activity.
I concluded the explanation of the purpose of the activity without saying they screwed it up...
but was so tempted to say something to that effect.
I also chose an activity for adults and the majority of the candidates chose activities for children...I hope that I didn't misunderstand the audience.
Time will tell...
I am creeped out about your observations about the youngest sister and oldest brother...
I don't think that happened, but the idea is really repulsive to me.
The question about S#3 and when it started for her also makes me think.
One of my biggest stumbling blocks to healing has been the guilt that I personally feel that I allowed it to happen to S#3...I somehow hold myself responsible for her inclusion. I know that it not realistic...and it has taken me a long time to realize that that was not my fault.
I am exhausted...
I read over that cracked blog...it is fascinating.
I used to get into trouble at school for lying...or telling stories. I remember after we moved to Forge road I got caught in lies by my teachers...I guess I didn't trust the truth.
I also see myself in the ultra responsible ...that has always been me...a curse and a blessing.
I will muse on these tonight and see if I get any other ideas...thanks for sharing.
Love and Light,
Maggie
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