overwhelmed

Clare,

I am overwhelmed…
barely treading water here in adolescent male BS.
My youngest is one again grounded for pot…
he becomes like a caged animal when he is grounded…
he lied yesterday to get out for a while…
is verbally assaulted me yet again in my car.
I told him he was a bully and became silent…
making him uncomfortable…
I chose not to engage.
He came home…
went to his room and got high once again.
He has a safe in his room, presumably with his hash oil and rig inside.
I told him that he has 2 choices: open the safe or I'm throwing it away.
He's threatened to steal stuff until he's 'recouped his losses'.
I don't know how to love him right now.
I have contacted the Arizona therapy program…
I am considering sending him back or to a boarding school for troubled kids.
I don't know how to do this.

We are birthing a family.
Perhaps he has to have his labor too.

My young man has been filled with attitude and acting passive aggressively. We talked and it's better, but not great. He lives in such a fantasy world that I have trouble really getting in. He believes he will be an NBA star, published novelist, rapper, and biologist in this lifetime. The problem is that he spends his time daydreaming about this and never practicing or working on any of them. I gave him the acronym GROW today:
Goals- identify a clear goal
Reality- what is the present reality
Obstacles- what obstacles and challenges do you see
Way forwards- how do you move forward?
I hope he thinks about this and at least sees some value to it. He is stuck on the 'reality' step…
he lives in a deluded reality where is a 'beast' at everything…
his word, meaning the best at whatever it is he's referring to.
It's very 5th grade (10 yr old) type thinking.

I am overwhelmed by my frustration right now…
I think I'm going to walk.

Love and Light beautiful sister,
Maggie