the story

Hi Maggie,

Something started twisting around in my mind. If we are to love our neighbor as ourselves, and we are all beaten down to a point of self repugnance, the love we have for our neighbor won't be very effective or strong. Or else we will try to soothe our pain by loving our neighbor more than ourselves, which won't be very authentic.

Maybe that's part of this pervasive violence we live in.  Knock out connection to self, and we have knocked out connection.

I like the approach you have been advised to take. Foster the boy you are already connected to, and continue to build connection with his brother. Then whether you decide to foster the brother or not, they stay connected.

Are you in the path of the storm?  We aren't, although we are in the peripheral path of the wind.  So tomorrow will be icy.  My least favorite pattern - icy winds. I think it will be an inside day.  I am working for a few hours in the morning, but then...maybe I'll write.

I had a committee meeting last night. I was able to understand and use the Brene rumble. I have been thinking a lot about,  "The story I'm telling myself..."  and it is a great tool to see how I am  creating a scenario just based on my worldview, my interpretation of what is happening. Somehow, even if I don't say it out loud, stopping to consider the story I am telling myself changes my perspective - just enough.

I noticed I am even telling my stories a little differently.

End of a longish week,and I find I am not thinking deeply or profoundly. Maybe tomorrow will be better...

Blame it on the full  moon?

Love and hugs from Clare

Stray thought - I have a friend who is healthier than I am, and who is very loving.  Sometimes when I don;t know how to be loving, I imagine her and consider something she might do.  Kind of back to the we help each other be more loving train of thought...