classic

Clare,

I can see how complex the issue is with our niece, her brother and S#3…
it is a different reality now…
she has chosen to be victimized this time…
so will she have the ability to complain?

I don't understand her reasoning.
I don't understand her desire to hold onto a man who is violent.
Perhaps it is a power play…
perhaps she wants to control and then dump him…
but, those kids are getting dragged through the mud…
that's sad…
and a lasting effect.
Our niece is classically acting out the little girl rejected by her father.
I am wondering if reaching out to her father and asking hime to speak with her would make a difference. Perhaps that connection would make her more integrated. But, can you trust that he would be consistent enough to allow her to see the good within herself? I'm sorry that she didn't reach out to the DV shelter near her- they offer free counseling, even if you're not in shelter.
The counseling is empowerment counseling…
she could use that...
we can all use that.

I'm sorry to hear about our nephew's reaction. I'm sure that you will be able to walk through this with him, and help him to understand- at least a little.

My youngest started at the local parochial high school today.
He was dragging his feet this morning…
got into the car 10 minutes later than I had asked...
I lost my temper…
It was not fun.
I have to learn to stop and think…
relax and let him take the consequences of his own actions.
If he's tardy- it's his detention, not mine.
My older son is avoiding home, studying and not doing well on his mid-terms. I'm at the point of suggesting taking the GED and moving on from all of this repetitive hassle. I don't know what else to do.

I hope that you have a great day.
Love and Light beautiful sister,
Maggie