A lot to ponder

Clare,

There's a lot to pull apart from those last 2 posts.

First the gay post…
I heard an NPR report that they have linked a 35K year old jaw bone of a Homo Sapien to neanderthal…
there was a large amount of neanderthal DNA intact so scientists started drawing conclusions…
or creating stories to fit those two pieces together.
Homo Sapiens originated in Africa…
Neanderthal in Europe…
You wrote that sexual activity should be between adults of the same species…
Well their story to explain this mixed ancestor was that as Homo Sapiens moved from Africa to Europe they met up an reproduced in Europe…
One species procreated with another…
and created offspring…
Was it rape?
It sounds like it must have been like the Europeans taking Indigenous peoples and raping them…
forcing sex by the power they held over them…
Is modern human a result of rape between 2 species?
It makes you wonder…

The enough post is a topic I go back to over and over again…
We can't afford it…
but there were exceptions made.
I find myself feeling rather petty when I think of who got stuff when I didn't…
so I won't go there.
But we weren't worth the investment is the heart of the matter.
We weren't worth it…
how can we ever be enough?
I've been working this theme with several clients recently…
and yesterday I had an amazing conversation with a friend…
How can we ever be secure in our worth when out parents devalued us…
not just didn't notice us…
but told us to be seen and not heard…
or that we shouldn't waste money on education because we're just going to get  married anyway…
or noticed when we were thin or fat…
but never when we were in pain or had accomplished something significant.
My friend told a story of finally telling her truth about domestic violence between her parents to a grandmother…
a few days later grandmother came to visit and my friend was filled with the expectation that something would be done…
the grandmother sat her down and told her that, "We're not really worried about you, But we are concerned for your brother's wellbeing."
My friend was devastated…
Why didn't her safety and peace matter?

She now perceives this as a testimony to her inner strength…
I'm strong enough to handle anything…
but she still hurts because people don't offer to help.

I shared my own feelings , which are very similar to hers…
and yet, last summer, I had to ask for and allow help to come to me.
It was a difficult lesson to learn…
vulnerability…
what a precious blessing.

One year ago, 6/28/14, I became caner-free…
Blessings!

Love and Light beautiful sister,
Maggie