Companions

I hadn't thought of the process of allowing the birthing process to proceed naturally...
I am usually in control of my own timetables...
you know me and the need to control.
I do value all that I have learned and I know that it has opened many doors in my mind.
I just have to remember to take time to just be...
That takes a near constant reminding...kind of like teaching myself to recognize my feelings and name them.

This semester I am taking an administration class...practical but not exciting.
I am also taking a social policy class...it is to motivate and help to to do basic community organizing...this is right up my alley.
My first assignment is to write an "autobiography of advocacy"...that should be interesting.
By the end we have to invest at least 20 hours into organizing some new initiative.
I think I am going to use a program that I have planned for First Day School...a Hunger Awareness Dinner...I have already laid the groundwork for it so I might as well reap some benefits.

I think I am frustrated by my apparent lack of progress with this healing journey. Last spring, when everything was raw, I felt as if I was taking giant steps every day almost. I know that that kind of raw-ness can't be sustained, but now it feels so distant and those feelings aren't easily accessible. I have to be patient and wait for the next 'wave'...just feel gratitude that I have come this far. I believe that the difference between us lies in the fact that you are alone alot more than I am and therefore able to access these feelings without constant interruption...but maybe that's just my excuse for falling behind...not that this is a race.

The book about science and Buddhism had an interesting image that reminded me of our journey...It was talking about those who incarnate in order to lead others towards enlightenment...it said that there are 3 ways this is done: a person can proceed alone towards enlightenment, leading by example for others .to proceed, they can walk side by side, helping companions and being helped along the way, or they can act as a shepherd and follow along with gentle guidance. I picture you and I as the second scenario...we've walked together at various times throughout our lives, helping each other to learn and grow...it's good to have a companion. Thanks.

I love the dream...
It was probably the bone of one of those viking ancestors...
keep digging.

I am tired and have to prepare for class tomorrow.
Love and blessings,
Maggie