blockages...

I have to read and re-read that poem...
let it sink in deep.

But my first reaction to your response is that I have never let myself be stripped of anything...
I locked my heart up so tightly, refusing to feel any hurt or pain...
I may be unloved...but I won't allow myself to be hurt in the process.

My wise friend and I were discussing resolutions today...
of course she challenged me to go deeper...
more personal...
stop hiding behind the intellectual and professional.
She challenged me to unblock the chakra dividing my intellect and my heart...(like we have been discussing)
to allow myself to feel rather than to dissect everything into components to make them more easily understandable and palatable.

She told me to be spontaneous and allow emotions to flow...
to "let my soul shine"...

Her words tempt me...but they scare the hell out of me.

If I can't wrap my brain around something then I ignore it...
my best defense is to intellectualize and she wants me to let that go and just feel.

A "Brave New World" awaits once I can unlock this piece...why can't I just let it happen?
It's too dangerous to feel...to allow myself to be open to the potential of being hurt...again.
I can understand/intellectualize the need...but have no idea how to do this...
the teacher comes when the student is ready...right?
I just have to work to open myself to the possibilities...and stop using my energy to block that connection.

So, I am intentionally opening myself to the possibility of feeling...
2013 should be interesting...

Maggie