I'm so pretty

Hi Maggie,

I'm sorry about your husband's friend's death.  I'll bet everyone talked about what he needed two years ago, when he almost killed himself.  But when he survived, life reverted to normal...

It's a lot like our family, with B#2's suicide attempt. I have heard through the family grapevine that things are bad again. But no one is doing anything. We all wanted him back on our coast so he would be near family.  But in reality, nothing had changed.

What does it take to be noticed? Or, maybe a better question is - does the pain ever stop?

Actually, something has changed.  We have created this space. We have learned that the pain can lessen...

I watched my baby today. She came in wearing polka dot pants and had two pony-tails, two flowered barretts and a flowered headband.  She put her arms out and announced,  "I'm so pretty!"  And I agreed, whole-heartedly.   The other day, I glanced back in her car-seat and caught her making faces. I laughed and told her she was so pretty.  And then I stopped, and reminded myself that I need to tell her how smart and strong she is. I don't want her to value being a Disney princess too much!

I stopped to wonder if I ever made that announcement...I'm so pretty. I don't think I have.  The closest I can get is - I'm not too bad. 

So how do we raise her to remember this? And then add strong and smart to it?

One last little observation for the day. I saw a meme that said Imagination used in a positive way is creativity.  Imagination used in a negative way is anxiety.

I need to remember this!!

Love and hugs from Clare