It's hard!

I remember how hard it was to have hormones  changing my body, my thoughts my understanding.  I remember how much I continually changed until I was about 22. It's really hard work.  None of us thought the rules pertained to us. We all thought adults were stupid. Your son is just verbal enough and safe enough to share it aloud.

I'm not sure which son is doing what, but my youngest girl compares your older son to my youngest son. Beautiful and charming and able to slide through so many things on these attributes.   Then life rears up and smacks them.  When they get it, life calms down.  When they don't get it, a friend of mine says - Spirit comes back and whacks them up alongside the head with a 2x4.  Still don't get it?  Spirit comes back with something larger...

Mine didn't listen, but I often said that if they think the laws are unjust, then they have a responsibility to try to change them.  With the way our country is changing, and the ever-apparent burgeoning power of the police state - the last thing they should want to do is break the law and make themselves vulnerable to the unjust power.

Gifts, like these boys have, are also trials.  Being smart and beautiful - and I'm talking about all of them - can be hard.  And again, as my oldest friend tells me frequently - it's the change in brain chemistry at age 25 when they understand they are mortal and bad things can happen to them. With my youngest son, my frequently repeated prayer - Just get him to 25, please. This week, he will be 27. And it's been a pretty quiet 11 months with him...yeah, don't ask.

I know men who are great with pets.  I guess I know quite a few vegan men.  So your initial reaction to adoption is a little foreign to me.  But I recognize the pattern.  It is always shocking when our innate bigotries show up.  I was getting to be good friends with a man, once years ago.  We had all kinds of really interesting lifestyle talks and information-exchanges.  Then I found out he was an OB-GYN.  I knew he was the bad guy - because I only ever went to midwives, and would only be attended in birth by someone who had physically given birth.  I was shocked, then I laughed at myself.  Then I gave him a chance.

My daughter had several friends spend the weekend.  I am so exhausted.  I   need sleep.  I really need sleep...

I love you, I'm thinking of you and sending you hugs of Light...

Clare