the twenty year rule

oh honey,

what a tough weekend.  been there, done that.  the consequences are never as bad as feared - or imagined.  i think the lesson is in going through it all, thinking about what we want, what we want to be.  i wish i were close enough to hug you.  it's so hard to step aside and let children take responsibility for what they did.  we stand by them, but they have to take the walk alone.

i have very mixed feelings about marijuana laws.  i think it needs to be legalized.  prohibition of alcohol did not work.  it simply increased crime and violence.  mothers against drunk driving worked - that was authentic.  i believe that if marijuana were legalized, authentic restrictions would organically develop.

how are you?  are you staying even and remembering to breathe?  and remembering how amazing your son is?

my house is a wreck.  i am feeling a little overwhelmed.  this is where i need to remember and relax...when the kids were little i developed my "twenty year rule" as a way of maintaining sanity.  basically, i ask myself if, in twenty years, will it matter that the dishes were not done today?  will it matter if i was a complete bitch in order to get them done.

ideally we have serene mommy in an organized house, but first runner up is calm mommy amid chaos.  in an ideal world, mommy-bitch never makes an appearance.

of course we have our secret weapon.  if we need to calm down, we cuddle with our little princess, and smell her newborn smell, and get lost in the delight of gazing at her.

i love you. i'm holding all of you in the light.

clare