passive voice

Hi Maggie,

My old dog seems to be off. She got me up at 3:30 to take her out, after which she sort of paced and wandered until 5:00, when I got up. I never went back to sleep, because I was waiting to see if she wanted something,or to see if she cried or whined or whimpered- something.  But she seemed calm.  Once I was up, she slept.  She also made three puddles before 3:30.  This is something new...

While I was up in the middle of the night, I was trying to go back to sweet memories.  I know they are there. But I think my mind needs to be a little more rested...

A lot of my sweet memories seem to be during the years Dad was gone...I'll have to work on that!

I saw a video today of a young woman comedian who appears in stilettos, a bra and a denim jacket. She does all rape jokes.  But none of the jokes are at the expense of the victim.  She points out that it does not take a short skirt, alcohol, flirtiness to cause rape.  All it takes is a rapist who feels he has the right to assault a woman.

I was reading something else about being raped. Basically, stop using passive voice. Instead of I was raped, the statement should be:  Someone raped me. Someone felt he had the right to rape me. 

It bled into another statement I saw written the way we see it, say it, then rewritten to encompass the truth.  What we hear, what we say is that They are stealing our jobs.  (They are Mexican or Muslim, whoever we are being primed to hate and fear this week.)  In truth, look at the business owner who fired you so he could exploit someone else at an even cheaper price.

I have long said there is power in what we say, in the words we choose.  Now I am seeing it unfold a little more.  I need to think about the whole of what I am saying in order to speak truth, then maybe someday speak truth to power.

I watched another video of a group of young black men dressed as women, ready to dance in a parade.  The police told them they could not be part of the parade, so the young men joined hands and danced down the sidewalk, following their band. People booed, and told them they were disgusting. They looked uncomfortable, sad, maybe a little frightened, but they wanted to dance, and so they danced.  Afterwards, several people came up to them and said the others did not have the right to treat them that way. A young girl came up crying, and said she thought they had the right to dance. It was really beautiful to see the support, but I was thinking about what I would like to do if I ever witness something like this.

I don't think very fast in the moment, so I need to think things out beforehand. And it came to me. The best thing I could have done was take the hand of the last man, and joined them, publicly. I think if one person does it, others will be brave enough to join, and then it becomes fun.

I hope I remember this.  Just join in and make it okay, or at least publicly announce that not everyone is appalled.

Random thoughts...

Hope all is well with you.

Love and hugs from Clare