stress

Clare,

I would love to visit, but I will be Reiki-ing all day Saturday. I got tickets for a college basketball game for Saturday for husband and the young men- to alleviate my guilt for being out of the house all day. It is a birthday present that he has wanted- it just happened to be VERY well timed.

I had spotty internet this past weekend- so I didn't check in.

I had some pretty intense discussions with my older son. He was accepted to the glass arts program that he wants to attend- so he's very excited. But,b before he checked the mail he was in angst over the meaninglessness of life…
what's the point?
won't we all die anyway?
what if I'm in the wrong universe?
this doesn't feel like home to me (universal sense).
We disagree on a fundamental idea…
I believe the world and people are good.
He believes the world and people are evil.
It is hard to find consensus when we are opposed so fundamentally- but we respect each other's ideas.

He was reminding me a lot of you dear sister- stop the world I want to get off!

Once he got the acceptance letter he was much less unsettled. He is starting to think about where he can live next year. He's leaning towards Phila. although I think it would be a mistake to live 30 minutes from campus. The commute would get old…
and he wouldn't really connect with other students if he didn't live close enough to socialize.

One more important turn…
he agreed to the background checks to allow the foster application to move forward.
I guess he needed time and space.
We all do.
Anyway- I am grateful to him for his open-ness to change.

I think you a re right about the stress and memory. I am sensing stress- poor appetite, interrupted sleep, poor concentration. Honestly, I think the idea of bringing the young men is so right, but the reality is daunting. I know we will have periods where we will clash and have conflict. I know it isn't going to be all happily ever after. But I also know that in the long run this is going to help them to be better adults. Perhaps keep them out of jail…
since that is what happens to so many young, black males.
It will offer them the opportunity to work towards their potential. I do have to admit to myself that I am concerned about what this will bring. It is all about LOVE. Love is enough to overcome obstacles.


The dreams are interesting. Which parental house did you visualize? The last one they were in? If so, it is weird to link that to resolution of your young past since you weren't a child in that house.
Houses represent souls- whose souls were you tapping into?
I have a sense that the grandparent's house with the black sense was either our paternal grandfather or the great-grandparent who was notoriously mean- that feels more correct to me. I think you were getting close to that dark energy that fed dad's family.
Maybe you can work to shine Light there…
Light turns darkness around…
maybe you can do some psychic work to Lighten the family tree.
"To see lilies in your dream symbolize tranquility, spirituality, faith, peace, purity, joy and bliss. It is also connected mourning."

Love and Light beautiful sister,
Maggie