try, try again

Clare,

I think we all parent somewhat from a "I'll never treat my kids like they did" mentality…
or maybe reaction is a better word for it.
I love my kids…
I will always be here for them.
I've been taken advantage by them.
I've loved them despite not liking them very much.

I had a long talk with a coworker today…
explaining that I do not want to continue with the responsibilities that I currently have…
I am filling in for a communications person.
I am creating and sending e-mails to different cohorts of the membership.
I am editing a training manual for updates.
I am going through our website looking for outdated references and non-working links.
I told her today,"this is not social work".
It felt good to admit that part of my dis-satisfaction is not being professionally fulfilled.
I've applied for a forensic mental health therapist's position…
basically working with convicted perpetrators of violence- sex offenders and domestic violence perpetrators. I was asked to write a letter of interest, which I did over the weekend. It was a difficult letter to compose, but I think it was honest in the end.
I am interested to see if I will be interviewed. I asked my reiki healer if I was strong enough to do that work…she told me that line of work is "more in line with my purpose"…and told me to proceed.
She warned me to protect myself…

I am really tired this afternoon…
a good tired though.
I mowed after work and feel relaxed.

I took my youngest to the DMV for his driver's permit this afternoon…
forgot to take my checkbook…
so we have to re-try tomorrow…
mea culpa.

Love and Light beautiful sister,
Maggie