I wasn't thinking about not telling our stories, I was more thinking of featuring others so we could use our emotional distance to bring out the important aspects people need to know. Then we use some of our story as the Me, too. And maybe we end with our stories, and...what I am also thinking is that our struggles, our ahas!, our changes are important, too. Hmmm...we'll keep thinking about this.
You wrote about living on the edge, and I saw you on a surf board - wild ride, but you kept your balance. I look forward to hearing your feelings after you give the ethics workshop. Do these teachings change you?
And now, for me...I had a wild night. I had a dream that led to a meditative state that led to some amazing breakthroughs in my thoughts. I hope my explanation isn't too confusing, but there are so many thoughts roiling together...I awoke at 4:00 full of the dream, wrote things, tried to sleep, turned the light back on and wrote some more...and finally gave up and realized I was up for the day...
The Dream:
In the farmhouse where the kids were raised, finding new floors under the false floors (which were the floors as we knew them when we lived there)...and suddenly there was an earthquake, the floors cracked open in one long, ziggy seam...tracked the seam and found it began at a "tube" - looked like a big vacuum cleaner tube which was pressed, nozzle down onto the ground...followed the tube back to a cosmic DJ who was blasting music to points in the ground...I asked him if he knew what he was doing, and he said, "Yes."
Woke up...in a meditative state...considering the dream...
Started thinking about joy, and tried to move joy with my heart chakra. I could move it up to my head and down to my heart chakra. I could move it out in front of my body and out the back of my body. I could move it out either side of my body, through my ribs. But I could not move it down below my heart chakra. I tried it a few times to prove to myself I could not do it. The DJ/music came to me, and I thought of three songs about joy. I started spiritually singing Joy Is Like the Rain. I envisioned joy-raindrops trickling down that core channel that connects the chakras, reaching for the yellow chakra. The joy could not move easily, it could not get past a series of parallel straws inserted through my core. It felt like/seemed like a torture technique. I just kept singing the joy down until it reached the yellow chakra. I could feel the chakra activating while the joy continued tricking toward the orange chakra. The orange started activating...I continued singing and allowing joy to enter from from the universe. Once the joy reached the orange, it broke through and flowed to and through the red chakra easily. It separated and flowed through my thighs and to my knees. Then my body energy became dense again. It was very hard to move the joy to my feet/grounding chakra. Once it opened, once joy broke through, I could feel the Earth. I "went" to a place I know on top of an open field, a place with a panoramic view. It was summer and I was standing in the sunshine. I stood and channeled joy down, then tried to absorb joy and send it up. The Earth began pulsing light. Each pulse, each heartbeat pushed the joy-energy higher and higher and I became a conduit mixing and sharing cosmic joy with earthly joy.
This is what we are supposed to be doing!
I thought about the breach, those straws piercing my core channel. I thought about the orange chakra - the four vibration. In its negative aspect, it is crucifixion. In positive, it has to do with kidneys, with establishing form, framework. My wounded chakra is orange/four. Our societal wounded chakra is yellow/five. I suddenly realized that orange is a yellow/red blend. Red is sexuality - it is three. Blending two threes, sexually, creates a six and ties sex to love. Rape destroys third chakra, creating a trapped, tortured crucifixion. Orange chakra is disabled. Yellow takes over, trying to control, because without orange, we have no stable form - no structure, our skeletal strength and flexibilty are missing. Yellow is focused down, broken away from the green/heart center. Love is, but it has nowhere to go. We are lost and bereft. This energy shows in our daily, physical life.
I stood on the Earth and felt that pulsing. The Earth asked me to go to a place in the woods, to stand in the creek, to find a place where there was a break in the canopy and the sun was shining on me. I found a place on the shale, with my feet in the cool running water - Earth, Air, Fire, Water - feel the pulse, feel the four elements. I felt a one-two pulse, a drumbeat from the Earth rising up, moving into the chakra on the bottoms of my feet. I felt myself running. I felt myself pedaling a bike. I felt myself dancing. The joy of running, the joy of dancing it moved joy from the Earth to the Cosmos. I even felt the rhythm of sex. I had a vision of true humans dancing tribally and wondered which emotions could be channeled from Earth to Heaven, from Heaven to Earth.
And I remembered the teachings of the people who lived in this place before we displaced them. Each species has its duty. Our duty is to celebrate, and to remember the celebrations.
There's more...I hope you are still with me...I tried to sleep, but it was coming too fast. it was too beautiful...
Orange chakra, four vibration creates a cross. When we are grounded, our energy reaches out to both sides to join with others, creating our joined community. It is appropriate to be joined orange to orange, to create the structure of tribe. A crucifixion, with arms outstretched and confined uses four to break the heart. (Consider religious images of the Christ on the cross, with the bleeding heart.) We are supposed to connect to those we love through the green chakra - with green and pink strands - a higher level of the web. Who do we love?
The ultimate message to us is: Joy is our responsibilty, kindness is our language.
To restore humanity, we must be joyful and learn to be kind. We must be kind to generate joy.
I have a friend who believes we must create a gifting society. I think she is correct.
I am exhausted. I am going to walk before it is completely dark. I love this Earth!
I love you,
Clare
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