See-Saw

Wow...I just saw that we have created 600 posts...
that's a lot of catharsis!


So I feel as if I am on a see-saw...
vacillating up and down...
and occasionally being dropped because the other person jumps off...
but I must reluctantly admit that sometimes I am the one who jumps and lets the other person drop.

I was asked to write a paragraph about one of my students who is receiving an award, he's a very gifted man who is curious and bright...a great combination.
I was looking for a great quote or idea to spark this paragraph and came across the qualities of gifted adults...and I fit so many...
the one that stopped me in my tracks was a tendency to loneliness and isolation...mood and energy swings...strong sense of social injustice...and the inability to ignore injustice or cruelty...a drive to self-actualization
maybe that's part of my answer, why can't I let all of this go and just be normal...
I'd love to be normal...if even for a little while,
but I am passionate about causes that are important to me...it's why I am going into social work and why I can't focus on one vulnerable population...because there are so many in need...and the basic problems are universal; disconnect and fear of not having enough. To me that is the bottom line.
So what am I going to be when I grow up?
I want to be so many things it will take more lifetimes to do it all.
"We can do no great things, only simple things with great love" -Mother Theresa
I need to remind myself of that, frequently.

Anyway the see-saw seems to be part of these gifted characteristics...
and part of the description of bipolar disorder...
What's exceptional and what is pathology? Where do we draw that line?
I am reading a book (yes one that is not assigned) called First Rate Madness by Nassir Ghaem.
It describes the most effective historical leaders as biploar in chaotic times and "normal" in times of tranquility, pointing out the need for different strengths and traits depending on the demands of the time period. It describes the traits of bipolar  as realism, resilience, empathy, and creativity...somehow I am beginning to  have difficulty seeing the pathology in all of this.
The lines are blurring and both are seeming to just be variations on normal...

So I will continue to see-saw, try really hard not to dump anyone to the ground, and remain open and accepting to ideas about my queer character traits...
I love you,
Maggie