Busy-ness is my addiction

I am not sure that I am getting much healthier...
my addiction has always been busy-ness...
controlling my emotions and thoughts by overwhelming my proceesing capacity...
I am doing it again...and I am so deeply in it that I have to complete these projects and then say no As new ones present themselves.
At Meeting today I had to postpone a Hunger Awareness Dinner that I was spearheading...
I had this idea...one that I had heard about years ago and have wanted to try...
so I set my mind that it would happen...
but that it would be a First Day School project...
well, no one else was really onboard...
particularly the parents of the older kids who were supposed to be planning and implementing this project...
I came to realize that I was the sole driving force...
so today I took responsibility for having to postpone it and I believe that I will wait for others to ask/offer assistance...
then I know that it is not just my project, but our project.
It was very hard for me to admit that I failed to pull off a project in front of all of those people...
harder than I thought it would be...
But I do believe it was the right thing to do.

I am glad that you had a web of support today for the baby shower.
I wish I could have been there and felt that...
but I probably would not have appreciated it since I am outside of that particular community.
Did any of our family attend the shower?

I had a long and wonderful talk with a young woman today...
she is also an intern and we were doing mindless work today which gave us the opportunity to just talk. Her Mom grew up in a house very much like ours..and she made a conscious decision to move
to another state to put distance between her family and her children...
this girl talked about resenting that decision, but coming to grips with it and ultimately supporting that decision in retrospect. She is an amazing young woman...I am glad to  have this opportunity to get to know her. We talked about relationships, respect, ethical decisions, how hard family relationship can be, our neurotic drives towards perfection...it was a good day.

I love you,
Maggie