older and older???

I was thinking about what my days would be like if I didn't have to work, especially at 5:00 am.  I thought I would get up early, go for a long walk, come home, have breakfast...so that is what I did yesterday.  Just after 6:30, the dogs and I were out the door for a ramble through the forest.  It was a nice start.  Then I planted irises and day lilies, then peas and greens and root veggies.

I checked in or saw my kids.  Nice dinner, nice afternoon...it was good.

For some reason, this year I am feeling old. I had a long talk with my best friend from college, and she says there's a reason for that.  But I feel old all of a sudden.  Before now I felt ageless.

My 48th birthday was also hard.  I think that was because I had my first babe at 24, and at 48, I had been a mother for half of my life. Seemed significant. Also, seemed exhausting...But now, I feel like I move like an old person...

So as of today, I do not eat sugar and I do not eat meat.  The sugar is going to be very hard.  I am asking for support from some of the people who are part of my daily life.  I am also wondering what will be sweet in my life.

I took a nutrition course, and so I am rethinking my diet, seriously considering nutrient intake.  When I was subbing with a group of kids who were 12 - 13 years old a few years ago, we watched Supersize Me, the documentary of the man who ate only McDonalds food for one month.  He became ill.  There was a story in the doc about a school in Wisconsin for troubled students. The only change at the school was a move toward whole foods from a school garden.  Improve nutrition led to a decrease in behavioral problems.

In class we discussed the importance of diet.  Afterwards, I had cafeteria duty.  I watched what the kids ate. They chose shit.  They ate sugary yogurts, potato chips, candy.  They ate quickly and left, throwing all of the vegetables in the garbage. Granted, the veggies were primarily canned, but still. I learned a lot that day about learning. Giving the right answer has nothing to do with learning.

So, I just finished a nutrition course, and I plan to actually use what I learned...

Maybe next year I will feel younger.

Somehow, this year seems like a turning point.  I have to make a choice.  I hope I have the strength to overcome addictions create new habits.

How is the project going? It sounds like such fun.  I am a bit jealous!!!

Back to work with me.

I love you, have a fun day,

Clare