Changing images

I am not sure that we are to be passionate about this vessel we reside in…
I am wondering how the Buddhist ideal of detachment plays into this.
Are we to just care for this body so that it carries us far enough to learn the lessons?
Are we to cherish the body because it is our home?
Are we too vain about the outward appearance of this vessel- trying to maintain it at any cost?

Part of me wants to be brave enough to withstand mastectomy and not worry about the outward appearance…
I've seen pictures of women who have tattooed their chest walls to hide their scars- but they do not recreate false breasts…
Would I be strong enough to be that brave?
Would I thumb my nose at conventional thought that women are only as worthy as their "parts"?
I am not sure what my level of braveness is…
I am not sure what level of deformity I can withstand and still feel whole.
What do I need to retain my female identity?

There are so many questions…
and part of me wants to look "normal" when all of this is finished…
but at what cost?
I could love myself…
with or without breasts.
At my age they are not as appealing as they were when I was 20…or 30.
But how much of who I am is defined by my silhouette?
How do I know any of the answers?
So confusing.

Until tomorrow
Love and Light,
Maggie