discernment

Hi Maggie,

I had a slow day at work, so I was able to watch Eve Ensler's talk. I have never seen The Vagina Monologues, although I know you have performed in the show a few times.  I totally understood her. I also have been separated from my body for much of my life.  She mentioned the book New Self/New World - I wrote down the title so I could remember.  I hope someday I can find it. I will add it to my list! And back to her talk - I was so emotional by the end, by the stories she told, especially of Africa.

I was blown away by your opening at meeting. Thank you for sharing it with me.  I remember a similar evolution with my ex.  He hated mixed marriage - but my friends B & L, they were all right.  He hated homosexuality, but my friend J & G, they were all right. I learned that an idea can be scary, but people are just people. 

Dad went through the same transition.  I think he should thank us for that.  When he disowned S#5 and said he would not go to her wedding, the rest of the family shrugged and continued making plans.

Why were we wise enough not to play drama with him?  I am not sure. I never considered this before. But it is hard to be hateful and bigoted when there's is no one to support you...

And so I started thinking. How do we create this for ourselves and for others?  I don't think of myself as bigoted, but a close friendship with a black man who trusted me, who I trusted, led me to understand I am racist. He pointed out some white behaviors, and described how it felt to a black individual. It was painful to own, but he was right.  And as a way-left liberal, I realized today, as I was listening to Russell Brand, that I am bigoted against people I perceive might have voted for Trump.  It is not overt. I am too whitey-nice for that. But it is there...

And then I started wondering what would happen if we went to our meetings, our monthly meetings, our quarters, our yearly meetings and we proposed starting a friendship program. What if we invite local temples, mosques, reservations, black churches, independent Christian churches...I don't know, think creatively - how do we access people who are not us, as we understand in this culture...What if we invite people and pair them up/pair ourselves up...maybe do a listening workshop, and set some guidelines...then pair people up and ask them to treat each other like friends for a specific amount of time.  Then, if the program is working, we friend someone else.

Maybe Jewish people won't be other anymore. Maybe someone Latino is just another grandmother, with concerns like mine.  Maybe a trusting relationship will deepen my understanding of white privilege. At least, if the government decided to round up the Muslims, or further torture the First People, I would be involved. They would be coming for my friend.

I have learned from my job that it is easy to get attached to almost anyone, anywhere.

If we do this, would that help bridge the disconnect they need between us to keep us afraid and alone?

I am testing for clearness.  I am asking for your discernment.  Do you think this idea was merit?

Love and hugs from Clare