Hi Sister,
I can't find my notebook, and I almost feel like I'm not quite home. I took notes and jotted down thoughts while I was away, with the intent of filling in when I sat down here before my computer.
Until I find it, I'm going to wing it.
Being there was wonderful. My son and his wife always make me feel like I am part of them, part of the family. I don't feel like I am a guest. I try to make their lives easier while I am there, stepping in and helping as much as possible, without intruding. And then, they take care of me, which always makes me feel off. I'm not used to having anyone else take care of me.
The last evening I was there. my daughter-in-law made me a lavender infused, epsom salted bubble bath. She put out facial potions and turned on soft music. It may have been the girliest thing I have ever done. I don't do things like this for myself...but while I was soaking, I started wondering what it is like to have someone take care of you, like really take care of you. Maybe there's girly hope for me yet!
The bus ride out was terrible. Delays, a breakdown, at one point, in Kansas City, I was in complete despair. I remember thinking - anywhere else, anything else - just get me out of Greyhound. It never got better, but I recovered from my funk, and met some interesting people, of course.
I met two women from the south. One was from Tennessee, the other from Alabama. Both told me soul wrenching stories of abuse. With one, we talked about different kinds of grief - losing your daughter - who escaped an abusive boyfriend, but he hunted her down and killed her - losing your grandmother who raised you, losing your husband, losing the dog who loved your husband best. She said each grief felt different. The other talked of owned women being strapped down, imprisoned. She talked of the culture in her village - no one talked about adult issues. She was raped at age 18. She didn't know what happened to her. She only knew it hurt for about three months. She was escaping by going to stay in a homeless shelter in a city in the northwest - starting over with absolutely nothing. Can you imagine the courage and faith?
The trip home was much the same. Buses that didn't work well. Drivers that didn't show up..delays, rerouting. More despair, this time in Ohio. I just wanted to go home. But I met a man who was my age who was going walkabout in the US. He had hiked in 45 of the 50 states before he had children. Now, a widower with grown daughters...the daughters told him to stop dreaming and go. So he was. He was camping, walking, hiking, hitch-hiking, catching the bus, and just having an adventure. I also met a young woman from South Africa who was from the Bantu tribe. She was raised speaking one of the tribal dialects, and learned English later. She was asking me questions about some messages she received from a school she planned to attend. She was alone in this country, no family or friends at all. She told me there are companies in Africa who take your finances and grades and field of interest into consideration and find a university in the US and get you enrolled. But the school asked for fees via Western Union. The person who tried to pick up the wire didn't have proper ID and so the money was bounced back. I was worried. So I gave her my email address and told her to contact me if she needed me. She was grateful. I haven't heard from her, but I have been holding her in the Light. Another courageous woman who impressed me. She is going to study psychology so she can go home and work with teenagers.
One more individual caught my attention and I will close with him, because I am tired, and I a going to work tomorrow, then have grandchildren overnight - because I missed them and because I am going to make them look at my pictures!! I was walking out of a natural foods co-op. I was sort of meandering, not paying attention to where I was going. I got to the door at the same time as a young man with dreadlocks. He stepped aside and held the door for me. I thanked him and apologized for wandering. He smiled and said he wandered too. He said he was into walking and herb walks. Now why would he say that to me? I looked more closely and said, I do herb stands. There are so many herbs everywhere you are, that you don't have to move to see the abundance. He smiled more and agreed. I told him I know the east coast herbs better, and he said he did too. Then he looked at me, opened his arms, and I hugged him. It was like standing in ginger ale. The vibrations were so high and joyful and other-worldly. We smiled and parted, and I thought of the old saying about entertaining angels unaware. I was caught with the idea of an angelic encounter.
So why wouldn't an angel be a Jamiacan boy with dreadies and an enormous smile?
Hope you are enjoying your faith weekend...
Love and hugs from Clare
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